Author: Lynn Paterson

The Emperor’s New Clothes

Lynn Paterson2 Comments

Greetings Beloveds,

A continuation of musings in the same vein or theme as the previous blog, The Hidden Beloved.

The ordinary self is not good enough. So I try to make it other.  I try to make other myself.  I try to impose a shinier version. I yearn to be this big shining star.  I effort to find something that I am.  I see an angel and think; maybe I am that still waiting to be discovered! Special, different, better, worse… all impossible.  The more I want to be special the further I take myself away from truth. The more I set myself aside from ‘others’ the lonelier I become.  I belie I am different in my suffering – no one can understand. I get the pleasure of the martyr which is no more than the pain of separation. Separating myself and negating the self are the same thing/action.  That I can be different, special, above everyone else was the promise and lie for I can no more be above than below.  But I can choose to experience them separately.  By separating myself I can choose to split the whole into two.  Or at least experience it as such.  But even oneness is imaginary surely? Still, it will do for now as it’s impossible to imagine nothingness, and I need some context for to have no belief also seems impossible. In exploring this unveiling the fairy story of the Emperor’s New Clothes came to mind.

I’ve written a new twist on the story. His story, the Emperor’s.  And I cannot quite believe that a brief search just now on the old fairy story of The Emperor’s New Clothes is now all about Russell Brand’s new film which is all over the news today!!! – Seriously, I don’t keep up with the media and had no idea when I started writing this several days ago.  Just goes to show there is no separation, though in the case of Russell Brand, I wouldn’t mind the illusion. But onwards with the new take on an old story:

The Emperor’s New Clothes

The Emperor believed he could separate himself and be above everyone else. Despite his ever increasing attempts to make himself special, this always failed to make it so, and he became a bit depressed and sometimes a little angry with himself, and drove himself harder and harder to achieve the impossible.  He decided to commission a new set of clothes that would finally distinguish himself from everyone else in the crowd on the great day of showing off.  The news spread far and wide. Clothes made, dawned the day.

Huge crowds turned out despite the rather cloudy cool day. Most were wearing their sheepskins to keep insulated from the reality of that. And of course, consensus reality meant all had already agreed to see what they were conditioned to see and forget that they had agreed in the first place, leaving them thinking they had a separate mind from everyone else, yet all happy to act the same anyway.

Except for a young child in the crowd outside the palace where the Emperor paraded.  This youngster was not conditioned or socialised, and some might call that wild or innocent. The child saw the truth, that the Emperor was not wearing any clothes.  In fact, his desire to transform into someone better created the inevitable –it happened. But not in the way he thought he wanted of course as he literally got naked to others before he was ready to get naked to himself! And it turned out that these clothes did the opposite of what he had tried to do; they did not provide a barrier to oneness at all.

As the child spoke up, the spell was broken and others saw through the eyes of innocence and the lies of better or worse than were exposed, just like the Emperor was.  Right there, in that moment, the crowd had a chance to stop the game and get naked too, but instead they chose to continue the game of duality, and chose the ‘better than’ role and ridiculed and shamed the Emperor for his pride. Shame and pride are of course opposites in the world of make-believe.

The Emperor also had a choice in that moment as to continue the ‘make-believe’ game or not. But heck, he was already completely bollocks naked, how much worse could it get???

He too saw through the eyes of the child and through the lies of the game and went to the child and thanked him for showing him the truth.  In doing so he simply swallowed and digested his pride which immediately gave him a huge sense of freedom and relief, plus a lot of ‘new’ energy to use.  His nakedness revealed his natural humanity which is quite harmless really, and so pretty soon no one was afraid of him being better than they any more.  In fact, everyone stripped off as the sun came out, the day became warm, people jumped into the fountains, splashing happily as others rushed off in great excitement to prepare a great feast.

And they all lived eternally ever after.  Though as humans, it was inevitable that the next day some were hungover as they were not quite ready to embrace the new and simpler way yet.

The Hidden Beloved

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Why is self-care so difficult? Why is say, sitting in silent meditation for only half an hour each day so darned hard to do? I’m not talking about guided meditations, snoozes, setting a sacred space etc. I’m talking about just sitting there with no distractions whatsoever. So why is that so very hard to do?
Because it’s really listening to ourselves – in sitting in silence with nothing else to distract us, we have to see who we are; we have to come face to face with who we think we are. It is very difficult to be intimate with the self; we’ll do anything at all to avoid, to void the self, to distract us from the monster within or the terrible emptiness that we think is inside of us.
This negation of self, this mass belief of the ordinary not being good enough, has created a monster of consumption that is never going to be satisfied for it’s impossible to fill a void that is not actually there in the first place. It’s all a lie.
The ordinary is enough, and trying to add to or change perfection can only take us away from that.
When we look at all the lies that we manufacture to convince ourselves that what our beliefs are right and that we need to change, to add or alter ourselves, we can see that the products of those lies materialise.
You’re being sold your self-worth. Oh dear! Hence the endless consumerism or the infinite inventions of that which is supposed to make you feel whole and complete.
The ordinary is enough is a realisation that the ordinary is enough.  But that claim, those words, that sentence, well, it doesn’t feel like enough does it?
And this can be applied to everything that is out there designed to change, improve, alter, whatever! It cannot be done. Change is not possible, only perspective can be changed. The more things change, the more things stay the same. That’s because you, they, me, everyone, is eternal and unmoving.That’s it. The key to discovering, to uncovering this truth, is to actually do the opposite of what we are all desperately trying to do – stop trying to change anything at all.Yes, one of the greatest lies of all time is that change is necessary, or even possible.It’s this belief that is the promise and driving force of all religion, including new age spirituality, and of course, one of the biggest money makers of all time.
“Be the change you want to see in the world”. This one had me in its thrall for quite some time till recently in fact, when I saw through the mistaken belief that change is actually possible.
The only thing we need to change, is to stop trying to change anything, especially ourselves. Only then will we be able to see that we are perfect exactly as we are. Though it does take some time for the layers of what we’ve tried to add to peel away. And it takes a lot of courage to face that which we’ve hidden from, to uncover the self-betrayal and self-abandonment and attempts to negate the self. However, when we’ve seen, and then become the Hidden Beloved, it’s worth it.
The realization may only happen in its own timing. Until then, it is inevitable that we will continue to look outside ourselves, to endlessly try to fill a bucket with a hole in it, and continue to fail to fill up from the outside.

Nothing more is needed.

Notes about “The ordinary is enough.” When I discovered this I wanted to explain it by saying how exquisite the ordinary was, but all that did was to start the re-layering process again. There’s no need to explain why the ordinary is enough, no need to find other words to describe the feeling that the ordinary is enough. It is simply what is left when effort is removed. The Peace of The Ordinary. The peace of Giving up Trying to Change or Fix IT. The Peace of trying to change yourself. There is no change possible – change is an illusion – it all stays the same no matter how much it ‘changes’. The lie is believing it can change. Action can only come from what has been done before. Right action comes from Being. You cannot change yourself. You can only change the way you see yourself.

Blessings,
Lynn

The ‘Present’ Moment

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The present moment – a way of seeing it.

We hide our gifts from ourselves.. in fact,we hide them so well that we forget what they are or that they were ours in the first place.

We wrap them up in fancy paper and when we deem ourselves ready, we present ourselves with the gift and we have such fun unwrapping it… we are so joyful when we see what it is!  This is known as a ‘present’ moment.

Eventually, we might also remember that it was pre-sent by the same self who received it. At this point we have realised (real-eyes-ed) that we are playing a game with ourselves.

wrapped gift

The Goddess Within

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Spinning within my comfort zone

Stoned

Comfort zoned

She appears like a flower, like a flame

Telling me it’s time to be naked to myself

She turns me around and around

Upside down

Inside out

Till the compass of my heart has found its true direction

And before I’m ready to go, I go.

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Post Mortemising

Lynn Paterson3 Comments

It hit me this morning, there’s nothing to be gained from thinking about what just happened. I didn’t just think it, I felt it in the body.  It doesn’t help with the present, and it cannot help the future either.  I asked myself:  What if you didn’t think over what happened and just let it pass?  Would you be disadvantaged in the future?  How does going over what happened actually help? Can it make the present or future better or safer or make you better somehow?  If you didn’t think it over, what would you lose?  Think about it…

Now, what if the experience of what happened was the wisdom you have gained?  And that thinking it over is not only a waste of time, but an interference pattern simply due to second guessing your action.  That’s it’s just a looping reel whose purpose is actually to keep you bound to replaying old patterns and that the very thing you think is helpful in stopping you repeating old mistakes is the very thing that is making you repeat them? In other words, going over what happened is actually re-creating them in the same image in the present and future.

Just for a moment, allow the possibility that the experience was all that was necessary. Continue reading →

My Summertime Sadness

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Summer time in all its fun and glory is a time when everyone should be happy or at least happier… right? Not always as far as I’m concerned; there’s an edginess to it that is hard to explain about summer, and I know I’m not alone in having some deeply challenging feelings in the summer season.

There’s many who share in this.  It’s not that I don’t love the sun and warmth and I especially love the long summer evenings when it hardly seems to get dark at all… but once the Solstice is over I can’t help but feel a disquieting, persistent thought that nips at my heels reminding me that the summer isn’t going to last; that it’s all going to be over and everything will dies.  I almost dread the first signs of the leaves turning in August, and yet I love the autumn.

Then there’s another part that feels even crueller; the disappointment of unfulfilled dreams.  Continue reading →

Time for a Change: Reflections

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I’ve been pondering on Gandhi’s famous words ‘Be the change you wish to see in the world’.

On Facebook it’s often quoted several times a day, I’ve posted in myself too and it’s been an inspiration and reminder to me many times along the way. It’s is often quoted in reaction to those who post about feeling torn up with suffering because they are not able to separate their own pain to that of others, of the worn torn victims, death, destruction, terror and loss that is generally accepted as given experience of life on earth.

I do believe that conflict resolution in first and foremost an inside job and that when we address the conditioning and erroneous beliefs about ourselves, we come into a state of peace that is then reflected back at us in our life experience.  On the larger scale, I also see that the state of the world is a reflection of our collective consciousness, our inner sub-conscious beliefs projected out on others, and the world in general.

And yet Gandhi himself led a peaceful revolution that brought about change. This he didn’t do by sitting on his tod sending love and peace to the situation. Continue reading →

Dissolution

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Separation is part of Nature’s cycle.

I feel the new calling to me. I feel the old Being stretched ever thinner, the veil tearing apart, disintegrating.

It’s time to let go of my previous roles and identifications with them. Before re-invention can occur, there has to be space. The old is literally falling away like caked on mud. Like ashes blowing away in the wind.

And like 2 tablets of alka seltzer dropped into the ocean, it may fizz for a short time, but soon it will be gone. Dissolution sometimes feelings like desolation, in the short term.

This is not an either/or state, it’s not a stage on the journey, it’s both/and/All. Because how can we have butterflies without caterpillars?

Decaying
Decease
Decentralisation
Decision
Decline
Decomposition
Decrease
Decrepitude
Degradation
Deletion
Demise
Departure
Descent
Desolation
Destruction
Detachment
Deterioration
Devolution
Dilapidation
Disappear
Discharge
Disintegration
Disorganisation
Dispersion
Disrepair
Disruption
Dissection
Dissipate
Dissolution
Dissolve
Disunion
Diversion
Divestment
Division
Divorce
Downfall
Dying

butterfly catapillar

Women and the Collective Pain-body: The Rage of Grief, Anger and Hatred.

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 “The soul of the world is crying to be heard, and only those who have suffered can fully recognize it. If women can come to know the sacred dimension of their own and the earth’s suffering, if they can see that it is part of the mysterious destiny of the soul of our world, if they can look beyond their own personal pain and anger to accept their larger destiny, then the forces of life can flow in a new way.” Llewellyn Vaughn- Lee

We must strive to be Real and never feel we have to apologize for expressing what is real in the moment, even when that truth is hideous to behold.  If you give it expression, it will not define or limit you any longer.  If someone cannot handle that truth, then let them go for they are not yet ready to receive you fully, and not ready to behold that within themselves.

Expressing Rage is without doubt one of the most challenging steps in becoming Real.  This is because the very nature of rage is that it is completely uncontrollable, chaotic and uncivilized.  Continue reading →

Porn Versus Life: Culprit or just a symptom?

Lynn Paterson3 Comments

Author Naomi Wolfe makes astute points and draws deep-reaching conclusions in “How porn is destroying modern sex lives”.  

The article opens: “These days, I am rarely surprised when, after a lecture or book signing, someone will try to talk to me about their addiction to porn and ask where he or she can get help.

As an author and feminist social commentator, I often discuss my work at events and meet a wide spectrum of people who talk to me about sex, relationships and, more increasingly, the impact of pornography on their lives.

There is no stereotype of what this person will look like….”

I too find that many people want to talk to me about their porn habits and how it is deeply concerning to them and destroying all hopes of having a ‘normal’ relationship. They are often feeling lost and confused. Some say they have never known good sex and some don’t even believe that sex (as we know it) has the potential of fulfilling them anyway. Continue reading →